Advice To My 22-year-old Self

Tali needed a shoebox to decorate for her Valentine's Day party.  I usually have a few stashed in a closet for school projects, but this time I didn't.  Luckily, I always have about 3 of them under my bed, holding onto my wishes, holding onto old pictures, hiding my secret stash of chocolate...so, I dumped the contents of the first Nike box I could find and gave it to Tali.

This is one of the things I found in that box. 

Me, at age 22, I just gotten my acceptance letter welcoming me into the nursing program at CVTC.  I had not yet become a mother to my younger three children.  I had not yet known the heartaches or happiness that would come with life, with some death, with some scares, and some successes. I did not know yet that the hurt I had known at 22 would pale compared to what life would bring later.  Noooo idea.

My life was so new yet.

If I could give my 22-year-old self some advice, what would it be?

I would tell her, Be strong, always, but don't harden your heart to love.  Having it broken will make you want to lock it up forever.  Don't.  You are stronger than anything that can hurt you.  Let it hurt.  Then, let it heal.

There will be very difficult times ahead.  Don't let them break you.  Don't. Let. Them.  They will make you wonderful if you let them. 

Do not tolerate treatment that is less than what you deserve.   Your feelings do not ever need to be sacrificed for anyone who truly loves you. 

Never be afraid to speak up for what's right.  Making waves is better than drowning.

Your heart will break many times.  Only you can pick up the pieces.  Only you can put them together the way they fit for you.  Do not trust such a job to anyone else. They will always fail, and you will always feel disappointed.  Heal yourself.  It's not up to anyone else.

Learn to forgive yourself.  It sounds so simple, but it really isn't.  Life is so much harder when we can't forgive ourselves for being human, for making mistakes.  You will be your worst critic, your harshest judge.  Be your best friend instead.

Don't spend so much time agonizing over every decision you make for your children.  Just keep on doing your best, every day.  All they'll remember is how much you loved them, how often you laughed, and what a good cook you were.  You can't go wrong with love.  Or great cooking.  :)

I Love You.

Your 37-year-old self, who wishes you'd had enough self esteem to kick the world's ass when you looked like this:

 Oh- and, don't take yourself so seriously, sweetie...

My Mom and I drinking Tequila.  Good times.  :)